Sojourner #051: Not To Yield - On Living & Leaving

“But they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” (Isaiah 40:31)

(This article is a part of our ongoing "From the Editor's Desk" series, a collection of essays from Sojourner Magazine's Editor-In-Chief)

Not To Yield - A Biblical Theology of Living and Leaving

This week I had to say goodbye to a friend. Though only for a short season, it would be silly to say that makes it any easier. Goodbyes are never easy, no matter for how long.

Due to silly things like OPSEC, I will not share any details about them - what they are doing or where. But for the purposes of this, I don't believe those details are necessary. They are my friend, and by their own confession, a real one. That is sufficient, in my book and hopefully in yours. This is just how we roll.

In the past week, we’ve taken the opportunity to gather together a couple of times - to reflect, remember, and rejoice in the faithfulness of God to His people - and to say goodbye. And goodbyes are never easy.

Marking Time In The Tension Of Faith

In the already-not yet tension of redemptive history, the people of God are called again and again to wrestle with suffering, wait upon God's promises, and rejoice in the glory of Christ - by faith.

On this side of the cross, we look back to the in-breaking of God's Kingdom through the Gospel of Jesus Christ the Righteous, living by faith in what He has done for us. This changes everything: the way we live, the way we leave, the way we love, and the way we lament.

As my friend left, we made it our ambition to set aside a few moments to simply be present with one another, to follow a biblical pattern of living and leaving for the glory of Christ. Faithfully serving where God has placed us. Joyfully following Him (by faith) when He calls us elsewhere. Entrusting our very lives to the providential hand of the Lord of Glory.

The Arabic-dial Seiko on my wrist - a gift from my friend - and the Momentum Sea Quartz on theirs kept ticking while we talked. Quiet, steady. Measuring time we couldn’t hold onto. We talked about that. How time’s always slipping, how none of us have as much as we think.

Watches aren’t just tools - they’re reminders, we see that now. Of how fast this all moves. Of how much we don’t control. That old Afghan proverb came up: “You have the watches, we have the time.” Haunting, because it’s absolutely true.

We can mark time, even measure it down to the second, but we can’t command it. God does. So we wrestle, we wait, and we rejoice - by faith. Wherever we are. However long we have. We use the time we've been given well.

Before The Face Of God: Lessons From Acts 20:17-38

Of course, this took us to Acts 20:17–38, where Paul says goodbye to his friends, the elders at the church in Ephesus, laying forth what I believe is a profoundly biblical theology of service in God's Kingdom. Whether staying or going, our lives are not our own. We are set down where God appoints, and sent out when He calls, all for the glory of Christ and the good of His people.

While it is not my purpose to exposit the full biblical narrative or recount our full discussion here, I would like to share some of the Coram Deo conclusions we reached in our study. I think they are most profitable as we seek to live our lives "before the face of God" - whether in living or leaving, loving or lamenting:

1. Faithful living is God's work in us, expressed by humble presence among God's people, enduring hardships with love, and boldly proclaiming the gospel - by faith.

2. Faithful leaving means placing God's purposes above our own lives, stepping forward when the future is unknown, and proclaiming the gospel - by faith.

3. Faithful living means staying watchful over our hearts and the people God has entrusted to us, holding fast to the truth, resisting falsehood, and loving others with urgency and compassion - by faith.

4. Faithful leaving involves trusting others, and ourselves, to God and the Word of His grace, knowing it is He who strengthens, sanctifies, and sustains us - by faith.

5. Faithful living resists selfish gain, labors with integrity, and gives generously for the good of God's people - by faith.

6. Faithful leaving embraces prayerful dependence on Christ, grieves in love, and rests in the hope of the gospel - by faith.

Wrestling, Waiting, And Rejoicing To The End

Paul’s model of living and leaving shows us it is possible to hold sorrow and joy together, not despising the shame. It is possible to weep with tears and yet count every moment as joy. It is possible to live in the moment and still keep your eyes on the horizon.

Whether wrestling with hardship, waiting patiently on God's call, or rejoicing in faithful service, Paul's farewell shows us that every moment can be counted as joy in the Lord of Glory.

Our wrestling shapes us.
Our waiting strengthens us.
Our rejoicing anchors us in the unchanging grace of Christ - the Lord of heaven and earth.

As we live and leave wherever God sets us down, we do so trusting His providence, empowered by His Word, and motivated by His glory.

In this last week, we have painfully realized the reality of these things in our own context. We have gathered, remembered, challenged, exhorted, cried, embraced, and knelt in prayer, completely dependent upon the King of kings.

This isn’t easy. It actually sucks.
But none of us would trade it for anything.
We would not, if pressed, have it any other way.

We press on, entrusting one another fully to God and to the Word of His grace.

That Which We Are, We Are

I have long loved the final lines of that old poem by Lord Tennyson:

“Tho' much is taken, much abides; and tho’
We are not now that strength which in old days
Moved earth and heaven, that which we are, we are;
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.”

There’s something in those words, some deep echo of the long ache of faith. A yearning to stand firm when strength is failing. A defiant hope that still dares to strive and seek and not to yield. And yet, as powerful as those words are, they are not the end of the story.

We have used our time together well. No one of us has done everything perfectly. We all have regrets. But we do not place our confidence in poetic willpower or human resolve.

We trust all of our lives, every moment, every weakness, every imperfect goodbye, to the Lord of Providence, who is able to work all things for good for those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose.

That which we are, we are, not by fate or strength of will, but by sovereign grace. And in that grace, we do not, nor will we ever yield to the tides of this world.

We endure - by faith.

Bajo El Mismo Sol, Bajo La Mano De Dios

There’s also the painting. A small piece of street art from a recent trip they took into Mexico - hand-painted by a local man in an art district, picked up in the dust and noise of real life. It’s a sunset over coastal mountains, where the light hits the peaks, like the moment is trying to last a little longer before the dark rolls in.

No grand gesture. Just a quiet handoff.

It’s the kind of thing that sticks with you, not because it’s perfect, but because it’s real. Beauty pulled out of a broken world by someone who took the time to see it. A reminder that even in the fading light, there’s glory. Even when the sun is setting, it’s still declaring the majesty of the One who set it in the sky.

Like the watches we wear, that painting hangs now as a reminder: our time is short, but not wasted. The light is fading, but not lost. We live and leave, stay and go, under the same sun, and under the sovereign hand of the same King. And wherever we are, we walk by faith in Him who loved us and gave Himself for us.

Not Forever, Just For Now

I don’t have a conclusion to this story. The days will only get longer. But whether we are present or absent in body, it makes little difference. We’ll endure, never one moment alone. And we’ll meet again, it is not forever, just the first of many years spent in different parts of the world, on both our parts, fighting the long defeat. I can live with that.

By their own account, this was one of the hardest things they have ever done, and I believe them. But it is producing in all of us an eternal weight of glory. So we are pretty excited about that.

For His Kingdom.

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