Sojourner #080: The Story Behind "Lead Like A Real Man"

"Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong." (1 Corinthians 16:13, ESV)

At a time when churches and communities are wrestling with the ever increasing absence of godly men willing to lead with conviction, humility, and courage, one Texas pastor-elder is calling men back to Scripture’s vision and godly design for manhood. 

Lead Like a Real Man, the new book by Colby Rich, elder at 7th & Main Baptist Church in Bonham, Texas, emerges from decades of ministry, fire-service leadership, and personal discipleship. Rooted in biblical truth and forged through real experience, the book seeks to answer a question many churches are asking: 

What does it actually look like for Christian men to lead faithfully?

From Genesis to the Gospels, Scripture reveals that men are called not to dominance or passivity, but to sacrificial responsibility (Gen. 2:15; Eph. 5:25–27). Christ Himself models servant-leadership, laying down His life for the good of others (Mark 10:45). That vision undergirds Colby’s writing and drives the message of his new book.

To understand the heart behind the book, we asked Colby to share the story in his own words. 

Colby Rich on Writing Lead Like a Real Man

A culmination of several things led me to write Lead Like a Real Man.

First, I’m pursuing an advanced degree in organizational leadership, so I’ve researched a lot of leadership principles lately. Pretty much every secular book and leadership expert builds on principles that are already found in scripture.

Second, I’ve seen how not leading at different times in my life has affected my family, church, and guys at my fire department. This book was a challenge for me, and I think will challenge other men as well.

Third, for all of my over two decades in vocational ministry, and my fifteen years in full-time fire service, I’ve seen so-called Christian men sit on the sidelines while others lead. When ungodly men lead in our communities and organizations, we all suffer. When men allow women to lead in the areas we are supposed to lead in, our churches and families suffer.

God laid the burden for book on my heart. 

Although my experience writing books is limited, through many years of crafting sermons and Bible studies, it seems like when God guides the content, it comes easy.

There are ten principles that can guide men to lead like a real man, a godly man. From acknowledging our faults to guarding our hearts, there are definitely steps we can take to kickstart leadership in ourselves and others. Mentoring/discipleship is a theme throughout the book. It’s actually written in a way that promotes going through the book a chapter at a time with a men’s group, mentor, or accountability partner. One of the challenges of the book is once you finish it, then find a mentor for yourself and then select someone else that you can mentor by leading them through the book.

My prayer is that God will use this to encourage and challenge men to get off the sidelines and into the game. Real men lead. Jesus gave us the perfect example to follow. We have scripture and the Holy Spirit as our guide, along with so many other good resources. 

What excuse do we have to not lead the way God calls us to?

A Message for the Church

Colby's words echo a growing concern in congregations across the country: many men feel spiritually disengaged or uncertain about their role. Scripture, however, paints a clear picture, one anchored not in cultural stereotypes but in biblical responsibility and Christlike service.

• Adam was charged “to work and keep” the garden (Gen. 2:15).

• Joshua declared, “As for me and my house, we will serve the LORD” (Josh. 24:15).

• Paul exhorted men to lead as Christ leads His church, with sacrificial love and holiness (Eph. 5:25–28).

• Titus 2 and 2 Timothy 2 call older and younger men into mutual discipleship.

These themes pulse through Colby's ten principles, especially his emphasis on mentorship and accountability, an echo of Paul discipling Timothy and Timothy discipling faithful men who would teach others also (2 Tim. 2:2).

A Book Meant to Be Lived, Not Just Read

Lead Like a Real Man is not positioned as a leadership manual for high-capacity executives, but as a discipleship tool for ordinary men seeking to grow in faithfulness. Its chapter-by-chapter design encourages groups of men to walk together through confession, responsibility, character formation, and Spirit-empowered leadership.

At its core, the book calls men to reject passivity, resist abdication, and step into the good and weighty work God has assigned. As Colby reminds us, “Real men lead”, not by worldly power, but by following the example of Christ.

A Needed Word for a Needy Time

In an era marked by confusion, the rise of disembodied transactions, and the erosion of biblical manhood, Colby's message rings with pastoral urgency. If churches are to be strengthened, families stabilized, and communities served with integrity, men must recover the biblical call to lead under the Lordship of Jesus, by faith in Christ alone.

And so the question stands, both from Scripture and from this new book:

What excuse do we have not to lead the way God calls us to?

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